Some of stress is good–even exciting. Some is not so good. So what do you do with it?
This summer, Shawn Achor spoke at Bowl Expo. My entire team got pumped, and we all read The Happiness Advantage. Allison decided for Q-3 that one of her “big rocks” would be to create a Happiness Initiative and so she set up a private Facebook group for our team. Periodically we all check in and post the meaningful things that come up each day.
This focus has provided an outlet to manage the “not so good” stress of the day to day. I personally am pretty darn driven, and when I get into something I get “all in.”
My follow up read after The Happiness Advantage is a book titled Positive Intelligence. The author, Shirzad Chamine focuses on how our brain plays saboteur or sage. The profound impact of how our “natural neurological wiring” influences the way we are able to manage our stress is revealed in a way that even this “hillbilly” can understand. Positive Intelligence goes beyond the “fake it till you make” positive self-talk.
One of the things that is on my mind today is an exercise Chamine recommends to strengthen that sage part of our brain that manages stress from a place of wisdom and logic, rather than emotion. That exercise is pretty simple and I am compelled to share it with you.
Take the stress that seems to have you in its’ grip. You know what I mean. You are paralyzed and can’t do whatever it is that needs to be done. You are agonizing over the time you don’t have to get that “thing” completed. You have some unreasonable worry about something that may never come to be (and usually doesn’t). OK-you have that picture in your mind? Take that stressor and place it… now move out to the end of your life. Look back on that thing. Does it even matter now? Is it one of the things that you’ll be thinking about as you take your final breath? Probably not.
I don’t know about you, but for me, when I do this, there is instant perspective about the reality of the things I’m stressing over. I think that I can explain it the best by saying that there is some type of “normalization” of that thing that has me stressed out and then comes a calm which is a super antidote for the stress.
I’m sure this isn’t new information for you. It wasn’t for me. I think my 10th grade geometry teacher said something like, “it won’t really matter if you understand why X = Y (still seems stressful and weird to me) when you are on your deathbed.” Nonetheless, getting the perspective of having this as an exercise that I can go to in moments of worry or procrastination is powerful.
I don’t know how stress shows up for you, but I’m sure you have some. I encourage you to try moving out to the end of your life and look back on the stressor to see the impact. It works for me-at least for today. I’d love to hear how it works for you.
